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Walkabout at the Nirox Foundation Sculpture Garden

**WARNING: IMAGE HEAVY POST**

Hello everybody

A few weeks ago, I shared in my newsletter about the Nirox Foundation Sculpture Garden. We visited it at the beginning of October.


This was a first for me.

We visited a walkabout at Melrose Arch before COVID and it was amazing. Some of my favourite art pics date from that particular walkabout.

Hubby discovered this sculpture garden when he browsed for something to do in our area.
What a treasure.
Here’s some pictures from this visit.

My absolute favorite art piece was this piece by Xhanti Zwelindaba. It’s called Truth and Reconciliation Commission: Apartheid’s Wishing Well, 2017. The artist is also in residency at Nirox.

On the property are other interesting venues. A spa. A restaurant. Artists in Residence.

We’re not fans of spas, so we decided against it. This is an absolutely beautiful spa with very well-trained staff.
But we love restaurants and food and good atmosphere and such so this was a definite winner.
Their menu was amazing. They would serve what I call ‘clock’ meals. They offered something small at 12. There was also something small at 3, 6, and 9.
But the food was amazing! Prepare for multiple orders because one order is definitely not enough.
The restaurant is called And Then There Was Fire

Some things I did not like at all:

  • You’re not allowed to take water in. You have to buy it inside. It’s only available at the restaurant, which is not nearly close to the gate. It’s spring in the North West, and temperatures are above 30 degrees Celsius early in the day. The owners could benefit by adding a water vending machine. They should place it close to the entrance or at the ticket desk.
  • Like many waiters employed in our region, English is not their first language. Therefore, the accent with which they speak is very difficult to understand. Make sure you understand what they ask or tell you.
  • A disgustingly polluted stream is running down the edge of the sculpture park. It is absolutely vile. This stream is a dark reminder. We need to do much more to ensure our natural resources are protected and not polluted. Tragedy, really.

What I loved:

  • Nature! It’s all around with art standing out. It’s amazing. Rolling grass, bird song, water features.
  • Every sculpture is marked with a number. It corresponds with the single-leaf pamphlet you get at the ticket counter.
  • It’s a treasure map with sculptures dotted around the garden. They are in no clear numerical order. Numbers 19 and 11 will be close by. Numbers 8 and 5 are also positioned together.
  • You can interact with the art pieces even though they are not interactive art. Big distinction.
  • there’s something for everyone, including obviously political agendas as well as celebrations of all sorts.

I think that’s it from me for today.

Have a wonderful Friday further.
Cheers

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Behind the Pages: The South African Influence on My Writing PART II


For those unfamiliar, I am a writer from South Africa. Born here and raised here.

Over the course of 5 posts, potentially more, I’ll share about me behind the pages. I will discuss what influenced me as a writer. I will also share how being South African influenced my writing.

My writing

My writing, as all writers, was heavily influenced by my upbringing and my environment. Writing entered my life nearly the same time libraries did. As much as I enjoyed escaping into books and stories and make-believe, my reality called for a deeper, darker place where I could hide and escape to.

I appreciate and love parents who encouraged their little writers in their writing endeavours from a small age. Mine thought God was punishing them for something by giving them a child that was seldom in reality. Therefore my writing happened in secret.

I filled up so many A4 hardcover counterbooks at that time. I hid these notebooks with my scribblings. The stories were always of dire situations and lots of violence and abuse. It both scared me but exhilarated me when I could cause that character to overcome the odds in a miraculous way. The ease and conflict-free pages changed with my reality to dark, suspenseful and conflict-ridden scenarios. Only to morph into a winner-takes-all all against the darkest most difficult odds.

Thinking back, I processed most of my days and all its troubles through the stories I weaved.

Shame the writing (writer)

Something I was never willing to admit was the shame that I carried with me and poured into my writing. Not just the shame about myself, my life, and what I carried with me but shame about writing.

Raised in the carefully crafted conservative, racist, politically moulded reality, shame is a powerful tool to keep everybody in line. And shame was something that worked double time in my parents. In my parents’ generation stepping out of line was a death wish. And both of them were quite rebellious come to think of it. The last thing they wanted to do in their lives was have children who stepped out of line.

Unfortunate for them, that is exactly what they received.

Fortunately for me, the environment in which I became an adult became a lot less of what it was but a lot more of a different kind of control.

We can’t get away from controlling people, can we…

But all in all, I prefer the modern day political and social environment. The African version of democracy is a far cry from the philosophical version of democracy. At least we moved past banning writers. We just threaten their families in which they make the prudent decision to move to Germany. Platforms aren’t banned from the South African population. If said platform can pay the bribe, they are free to do and be here.

**I promised myself to keep blog posts to no more than 500 words so I’ll end this post here.

Thanks for reading. Look out for the next post in this series where I’ll go into a little bit more detail about my writing

Cheers!

Continue reading…

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Crafting stories that triumph over adversity: A writer’s journey

red human face monument on green grass field

I love the underdog in stories. I’m a total sucker for them.

I’ve always been drawn to morally grey characters and villains in stories. Most villains fascinate me, though I can’t say the same for the ones in slasher movies. But even then, if you dig into Jason’s backstory, it might stir some empathy.

It’s not difficult for me to write about people from the wrong side of the tracks or those society has trodden down. In my personal life, I’ve had to dig myself out of difficult circumstances. In a way, it’s ‘easy’ to identify with having the odds stacked against you. This connects to the advice to “write what you know.”

However, I also believe we should “write what we want to learn” or “write what we’re curious about.”

Fiction vs. Real Life

In fiction, characters evolve. In real life, our habits often keep us stuck in the same cycles. Through much discomfort and suffering, I’ve learned that life often gives us chances to change, find better ways, and learn valuable lessons. Yet, our fears, habits, and prejudices often hold us back.

There’s a dark saying—though I can’t recall who said it—that the greatest potential lies in the graveyard. In the cemetery, you’ll find unwritten books, undiscovered inventions, and unsolved problems. It’s grim, but there’s truth in it.

Just as life presents opportunities for growth, our stories often start with characters who have flaws. Sometimes these flaws are simple obstacles they must overcome. That flaw becomes both the problem and the solution. I’m not the most eloquent writer, so don’t take my musings as gospel. But in my experience, human beings, living or dead, make the best characters.

Finding Inspiration in People

People and their behaviours fascinate me. It’s not a very creative approach, I know, but it’s intriguing how inventive people can be when facing problems—and how they come up with solutions. Character inspiration is all around us.

History is filled with colourful characters too. Just ask George R.R. Martin. His epic stories are packed with real events and real people from history. I haven’t read his books yet, but I’ve watched Game of Thrones, and I imagine the books are just as good. Usually, they are, though I don’t want to assume and look foolish.

Stepping Into My Characters’ Shoes

When I write, I like to put myself in my characters’ shoes. I think about what I would have wanted to happen if I were in their position. It’s a bit like the therapy technique of ‘mothering the inner child.’ Therapy has been an important part of my life—not just during crises, but as a maintenance tool to stay grounded.

The idea behind ‘mothering the inner child’ is that, during trauma, a child may get stuck in that moment, unable to process it. Therapy helps by offering the love, support, or instruction that was missing at the time. This allows healing to begin. Once that healing happens, harmful coping mechanisms can be replaced with healthier ones.

For my characters, I often place someone or something in their path that acts as the ‘mothering’ figure they needed in their past. For example, in my story Frances & Gilbert, Frances gets stuck in her grief and loss after her parents die. Her environment exposes her inexperience as a young woman suddenly in charge of running a household. She’s tricked by scheming members of society. The ‘mothering’ figures I chose were both Gilbert and his aunt. They help her move beyond her sorrow and shield her from those who would exploit her.

I had to condense the story to fit the novelette format, but the heart of it remains.

Writing the Dark and Healing

As curious as I am about writing spicy romances, I find it difficult to shift my focus away from character development. For me, scenes of spice and sex can detract from that. However, I do want to take a class on writing this side of storytelling at some point.

Ultimately, I want my readers to connect with my characters. I want them to feel encouraged or inspired by the characters’ journeys.

I recently listened to an author who writes dark, suspenseful romance. She shared how her books appeal to readers who have lived through similar experiences of violence, manipulation, and abuse. Many of these readers developed a sort of Stockholm Syndrome in their real lives. The author herself had lived through similar trauma, and after writing many of these books, she found healing.

I thought it was amazing that through her writing, she could heal her inner child. Her characters’ repeated experiences of trauma and redemption helped her work through her own pain. I’d love to talk to her readers and ask if they feel the same. Are they finding healing through the characters too?

Life Imitates Art, and Art Imitates Life

At the end of the day, life and art often reflect each other, including our hurts and pains.

In summary, my characters usually develop from my own experiences or from real people, living or dead. I pretend that my characters are the inner child needing healing and nurturing. The characters and environments around them become the ‘mothering’ figure, offering the support they needed.

I hope my readers find inspiration or comfort in these characters’ journeys, or at the very least, enjoy reading their stories.

Thanks for reading!

Cheers until next time.

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MOVING

shallow focus photo of furniture with bubble wrap

Moving…

probably one of the worst things I’ve ever done and will ever do. The thing is, we’ve done it so many times, that we can do it eyes shut! Okay, probably not eyes shut, but definitely mechanical.


13 times of moving probably gives one the qualification of an expert! It does not include co-living or lodging though. Add about another 9 to the figure then.


At some stage in our married life, we’ve moved for as many times as we were married. When we celebrated our 10th anniversary, we moved our 9th time a year later!


It has slowed down significantly since then. Thank goodness.


We’ll be celebrating our 23rd wedding anniversary in 2025 and moved the 13th time earlier this year.


We’ve rented, owned, shared, and lodged throughout the years. We can say with confidence that it’s just much more bearable moving to your own property. No rental or co-living!
I was raised in a house where you needed at least 3 months to prepare for a move. But our last 7 moves happened within 2 weeks when the new property became available. Once we actually moved within 3 days!

We used a packing company once to pack for us, the rest of the time it was hubby and I and our boys. Moving between cities we’ve used furniture removal services. But the rest of the time, we rented trailers to move.
When we got married, Hubby had the opinion of paying someone to do stuff for him (snobbish much?!) but has learned in the meantime that there is nothing wrong with his own hands and that a restricted budget is just the thing to teach one the bliss of packing and moving.

Some lessons we’ve learned:

  • No matter how well you pack, something always breaks: it could be a glass, a mirror or a toy. We’ve moved our upright piano a few times in our many moves and although it was crated, covered, packed or whichever way the movers used, two of the white notes still broke. Very sad but at this stage an enjoyable annoyance for one of the kiddos when they played along on the piano. Not so much now.
  • Do not dispose of cardboard boxes: collapse the moving boxes as well as the boxes in which you buy equipment or appliances and store them away. We don’t necessarily use the mixers box for the mixer but it is very useful to pack fragile glassware or move-sensitive electronic equipment into a bigger cardboard box. Also, the boxes in which most appliances are shipped, are strong and thick enough to protect the specific item. Storing these boxes is not as big an issue as one would think and maybe I’ll share how we do it another time
  • Clean house! Packing is one of the most valuable opportunities to rid your house of all that hidden clutter! The stuff that you pack away for one day. We all know that when a project is not started and finished within a few months from the start date, it will never happen
  • Prepare the children: we found that the children want to know. And they want to be part of it. There are enough tasks during the move that they can help with. If you have little ones, let them pack their own toys, additional clothes, bookshelves and such. If you have CDs and DVD shelves, let them pack those. Explain to them that it’s still something they need to handle with care and help them see a ‘system’ in their packing. Start with little boxes for wee little ones. Another cupboard they can help pack is the linen cupboard. Although I prefer packing the linen at the bottom of the breakables boxes, it leaves more than enough that they can help with. Remember your plastic cupboard and trays/baking tray cupboard. Also ‘hard labour’ resistant!
  • Pack the children’s room last: it helps to create a sense of security for an extended period of time. In the new house, organise little people’s rooms first with beds made, least boxes standing around and curtains hung.
  • Organise the bedrooms first AFTER the move with at least two things in place: curtains and beds. The rest can wait for tomorrow.
  • Keep basic toiletries separate from everything. Know where this box or bag is at all times. Nobody appreciates unbrushed teeth or the unavailability of toilet paper. Ask me how I know…
  • Determine what will be needed in the kitchen, bathroom, scullery, etc for the last week before the move and put that in a special cupboard or higher shelve. The rest are safe to be packed. Be reasonable with this. Ask yourself the questions that matter: Are we going to go snowboard this coming week? Did I plan pizzas for this week? Do we need the slow cooker and the bread machine? Are we going to use all 16 big plates for the 4 of us? Etc. You know what your family needs and you know your family’s routine.
  • Make a list! We usually have a clipboard with sheets of paper numbered 1 to 50 for starters (or whichever number of boxes you estimate), a pen or marker, a stack of blank white stickers and a bag of brown tape for sealing up boxes. Every time a box is closed, we seal it with brown tape. Then it gets a sticker with a number. The list gets a description of the box contents. For example, the DVD box is ready to be closed up and sealed. The next open number on the list is 17 and we stick a sticker on the box with 17 written on it. We write a summary of the contents of the box onto our list next to number 17 and then only is it sealed up with the brown tape.
  • Allocate one area in your house where the sealed-up boxes can be stacked up: this opens up space to work, is out of accident way and prevents any scenarios of stagnation. There is nothing that freaks most people out than boxes standing everywhere! This has worked well with our last 10 moves. One particular move we we moved out of a very small house, with already limited room under normal circumstances, it was super crowded during our move. It also limited the temptation for our little ones to climb ONTO the boxes when we were not around.
  • Quick and easy meals: this would be the one day in my meal planning where takeaways are necessary. If not takeaways make snackwiches or sandwiches or muffins. If you have some kind friends who are willing to cook up a storm on your behalf, bonus! Another option is the prepared meals available now from all the major supermarkets eg. Checkers buffet is amazing, Spar and Pick’nPay’s are not too shabby. But the reality is that our people need to eat even when the task at hand is probably the most traumatic and horrendous a family can endure. Lift a little from your shoulders and let this one time slide. Tomorrow you can do the cereal and milk or buns and cold meat shortcut meals but today, get the tummies full! Something else to keep in mind would be heaps of fruit and fresh water. I try to keep this at hand most times when moving.
  • Keep the toiletries close: We usually keep a small suitcase aside. This suitcase includes everybody’s pj’s for the first night in the new house. We also pack the necessary toiletries and towels for the morning before the move and first night at the new house. Additionally, we include a comfortable set of clean clothes for the first day in the new house. Remember comfort! The big unpacking is going to start then.
  • Always use smaller boxes: we’ve found that book boxes from a retailer like Boxman are perfect. It’s a little bit more pricey but it keeps. It can take a load of books (we have lots of books) and keeps crockery and other breakables safe and sound. And it’s easier to move and stack. We’ve moved with all sizes of boxes and I promise you, bigger boxes might take a lot of stuff but it breaks and falls apart with the handling and then you need to pack it into two or three other smaller boxes.
  • Invest in bubble wrap. I know it’s not eco-friendly at all. Neither are tons of newspapers. Pick your poison. Price-wise, it’s the same really whether you buy 2 rolls of bubble wrap or buy 20 Sunday papers.
  • Move clothes in suitcases and duffle bags. Most of us have all sizes from all sorts of events collected throughout our lives, use these to pack your clothes. Box companies do have clothing boxes available but I’ve found it’s incredibly clumsy to move. Another option if you are moving in the same town/neighbourhood, allocate one of your vehicles with a boot (trunk for my US readers) and load it up with all your hanging clothes. A surprising amount of clothes fit into a boot in this way. If your shoes are in their boxes, you can line the bottom of the boot with the boxes and put the clothes on top, otherwise, a garbage bag full of shoes is a good second best. Of course, you can fill up packing boxes with clothes. Avoid using big boxes just because the illusion exists that it will be light. It won’t.
  • Remember to pack up the garage, if you have one. This is the one space we’ve forgotten about until the day before the move! Garden equipment, tools, bicycles and those other stored items, are clumsy and difficult to pack. It will most probably be moved just the way it is, but do yourself a favour and grab a box to fill. You’ll be surprised what can be packed.

Well, this is our list of absolute bare necessities learned in the whole house-moving adventures.


This was a long post but hopefully, there are some pointers you could use.


Good luck with your move, I hope this helped.
Cheers

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When someone elses addiction causes you pain…jump on a ship!

Hello my dear readers

I’m so happy to finally bring you this blog post.

Since the last time I added a #BAS post, the series name changed. Books 1, 2 and 3 became available on Amazon. They will also soon become available everywhere else books are sold. AND!!!

Drumroll please…

My author shop came online! I’m so happy about this, you have no idea.

Back to the post at hand.

I’m very happy to introduce you to Book 4 in my The Unknown Series (previously Cape of Good Hope Series).

What is my #BAS posts?

I make my pre-edited books available to my readers here for free.

Each story has been written, rewritten and proofread but NOT professionally edited. This is my in-between step while I’m working with my editor. It allows me to get your feedback and opinions. Without my readers I can’t be a writer, so please don’t hold back!

Back to this new series of #BAS.

This book is titled Marcus & Alexandra.

The idea for the story came from the first ‘adult’ book I read when I burned through our town library.

This is very much a hidden gender or mistaken gender trope story.

Alexandra is my heroine and she becomes part of a transaction with a pirate. She does not take one for the team. She hides her gender and escapes onto a merchant ship. The ship set sail from the Fair Cape to Europe during the 1820’s.

Marcus is the hero in this story. He’s made his appearance in Jack & Jool and Zara & William. After tragedy in his life, he’s taking to the sea again.

You’ll encounter a setting larger than life, colorful side characters and then the notorious antagonist in this story.

Anyways, like the previous books in this series, this book will become available chapter by chapter every Friday, 20:00, CAT / GMT+2)

Here’s a version of the description.

After nearly a decade of education in England, William Tredoux returns home to find not just a family estate. He discovers a familiar servant girl who has transformed into a breathtaking young woman named Zara. Her presence ignites memories of their childhood, yet the layers of mystery surrounding her past remain untouched. Zara entered the Tredoux household under enigmatic circumstances. She has been a devoted member of the family ever since. She yearns for a life beyond the confines of servitude.

When William reveals the truth about Zara’s heritage, their worlds collide in a whirlwind of emotions and opportunities. Suddenly, Zara is thrust into a life of privilege. She had only glimpsed this from afar. She leaves behind the shackles of her past. However, this change does not come without its trials. Those who have long looked down on Zara are unhappy with her elevation and conspire to undermine her newfound happiness. As love blossoms amidst adversity, Zara must navigate the treacherous waters of societal expectations and personal discovery. Will she rise to claim her rightful place, or will the shadows of her past threaten to tear them apart? Join Zara and William on a transformative journey filled with love, identity, and the courage to defy the odds.

Marcus & Alexandra (The Unknown Series) by Anne C West

Like the previous #BAS posts, it will be password-protected which is available for my newsletter subscribers. I’ll send you reminders every Saturday. They will include a link and the password to read this book for free.

For the rest of you, please subscribe to my newsletter at the bottom of this post to receive the reminder.

And that is it for today.

Until next time

PS. The password to my Blog A Story posts are in my newsletter. Please subscribe below

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So I’m Curious…could pausing be an act of love

A client had this small nugget she dumped in my lap when we had a call once.

Since our calls are usually around death and taxes, we start it off enquiring about the children, the grandkids, the extended family, the struggles, the whoo-whoo, politics, the weather, and whatever else, to put off the conversation about death and taxes.

This one particular call, she dropped it in there, ‘If you loved yourself, what would you do’.

To say it startled me to silence is not exactly how it was. It was worse.

My brain froze. My tongue went numb. And I doubted my hearing.

Let’s call her Suzie.

‘What would you do in this moment, right now, if you loved yourself?’

Suzie giggled nervously.

Thinking back now, I think the question surprised her as well.

When my brain finally decided to work again, I thought, quit. Close the business. Resign from all the clients I had. Move the extended family back to where they came from. And quit.

Since Suzie was my client, I couldn’t exactly tell her that!

Fear is a disconcerting thing.

  • What if she fired me as her service provider if she knew the truth?
  • Where will I get money from?
  • Who will help the disabled family?

These were some of the questions that rambled through my mind.

‘Nearly 100% of the time when I feel overwhelmed and bogged down and I ask myself ‘what would I do if I loved myself?’ the answer comes back ‘nothing’. And nearly all of the situations it was exactly what I had to do, nothing. It sorted out in the end.’ Suzie went on to explain.

My mind rattled on with this uncomfortable revelation. We got through the call. We finalised the taxes. And we said our goodbyes to continue the conversation in a year again.

Fast forward nearly a year, and I’m on the phone with Suzie again. Yes. It’s death and taxes time.

We go through the normal ramblings about the children, the grandkids, the extended family, the struggles, the whoo-whoo, politics, the weather and whatever else to put off the usual inevitable conversation about death and taxes.

‘It feels the harder I work, the less I have to show. I think all of us feel this way.’

Don’t you just feel the exhaustion from these simple and honest words?

As is my usual way, I blurted out, ‘What would you do, if you loved yourself?’

Those simple words helped Suzie to get quiet at that moment.

What Suzie didn’t know at this time was how much that single question helped me with various difficult times that were forced on me the preceding year.

Every time I felt exhausted or drained or just ready to quit, I would ask myself ‘What would I do if I loved myself?’

Every time I wanted to violently dispose of an obstacle, I would ask myself ‘What would I do if I loved myself?’

Every time I felt a bit volatile and emotional or my insomnia-riddled mind gave me wool when I asked for clarity, I would ask myself ‘What would I do if I loved myself?’

I can say with absolute conviction that every time, the answer was nothing.

Nothing sometimes looked like shutting down the computer. Or take a nap. Or postpone a meeting. Or cancel a meeting altogether. Or ignore a phone call. Or answer a message later.

How did I know that nothing wasn’t just laziness or abdication or an excuse? How did I know that nothing was just ignoring what I didn’t want to deal with? Or just a bad habit?

Because, every time, nothing was the best solution to the problem. My actions, words and solution would have prolonged the drama, complicated the outcome or postponed the inevitable. More information also became available in some situations that allowed me and my co-conspirators to study all of what was available.

Doing nothing is sometimes the quickest path to peace and wisdom. Both conditions from which we as humans can think clearly. We do our best work from a place of peace and wisdom.

Doing nothing saved my skin a few times as well. A hasty decision. A mistake. A dodged bullet.

From the obvious theme of the question, loving myself, I’m surprised at the pause it brings to me. Not only am I confronted with loving or hating on myself in the moment but I pause.

Before I continue any more, I can’t take the credit for this tool. I’m gaining nothing from sharing this with you just proposing a tool to help in moments of stress or struggle. My client Suzie went on to work through the course by Eilat Aviram. You can find more information about Eilat and her work on her website ifilovedmyself.com. Here the loving yourself part is explained and developed as the writer of the book and course intended. Please have a look if you so please.

Back to nothing…

Asking myself ‘What would I do if I loved myself?’ has helped me create that distance between the problem and my thoughts and actions.

It’s helped me to get to know myself. It’s helped me to focus on myself.

Through pausing and stepping back, I’m learning the ways to love myself. Too many times we push through stuff that brings harm to our very being. Harm we seldom realise we inflicted until much later.

Prevention is better than cure, is the adage. And truer words are seldom remembered. Most of our harm we brought to ourselves. Sometimes unknowing such as childhood trauma when our loved ones neglect their responsibility in teaching us certain things.

As adults though, we have the reigns in our own hands and are we responsible for the harm we do to ourselves. Harm which we also do unknowingly because we don’t slow down. We don’t pause. We don’t move from a place of love, peace and wisdom.

I’ve always wanted to get to this place that Stephen R Covey wrote about in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families ‘Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our happiness.’

Nothing has become the symbolism for the gap or space to calm down, to get back to the now where life actually happens instead of in the future, bogged down by what is not even there yet and almost never is! Or the past where we are powerless to change it and just learn from it.

So I’m curious…what would you do if you loved yourself?

**Please send me an email with your feedback at anne@annecwest.co.za. Comments vanish and get missed, hence emails.**