Are you a person who always seems to give others all your energy, time, ideas, and your being? Do you look at your dreams with yearning and just can’t figure out why it always lags? Then this is the book for you. [DON’T BE FOOLED: it’s not just women who love too much]
Description
The #1 New York Times bestseller that asks: are you a woman who loves too much? -Do you find yourself attracted again and again to troubled, distant, moody men—while “nice guys” seem boring? -Do you obsess over men who are emotionally unavailable, addicted to work, hobbies, alcohol, or other women? -Do you neglect your friends and your own interests to be immediately available to him? -Do you feel empty without him, even though being with him is torment? Robin Norwood’s groundbreaking work will enable you to recognize the roots of your destructive patterns of relating and provide you with a step-by-step guide to a more rewarding way of living and loving. If being in love means being in pain, you need to read Women Who Love Too Much.
What says I?
This book came at a good time for me. I learned a lot about myself. And best of all, it explained WHY regarding my habits
Patterns identified
We all live lives of patterns. Through an immense amount of examples from real-life people, the author guided me to identify patterns that have been part of my life, my whole life. And to be clear, drinking until you drop dead or bulimic habits are not the only harmful patterns in one’s life. Something as simple as helpfulness to the point of self-neglect or justifying neglect, are sneaky patterns.
Analysis of harmful patterns
The author did a great job to analyse and demonstrate the harm of the different patterns. They also illustrated the different faces of the same harmful patterns. At some point in the book, I felt irritated that she included one example after another example after another example of what seemed to me the same scenario. Only, it wasn’t. The same harmful pattern can come about from different trauma as well as the same trauma can cause different patterns.
Look and feel of healing
Many times in the healing process it feels as if nothing happens. In this day and age, we want to add water, shake and voila! Results! Healing and change take much, MUCH longer in reality. The author helped me see that some patterns in my life are in the process of healing. I can see the pattern is still there, but it’s leading to a different outcome. Not necessarily good for me, but not as damaging as the original outcome. It’s encouraging and so SO good for me to have learned that
Help is at hand
Healing is always your own journey. Nobody and I mean NOBODY can help you with it. Therapists, support groups, counsellors etc. are only facilitators and support. Nothing more. And for the love of all things wonderful, FAMILY and FRIENDS cannot and should not be your help! It’s harmful to them and harmful to you. The author gives a list of 10 steps for the healing process at the end of the book. That I appreciated immensely.
What says others?
Erica Jong referred to this book as ‘life-changing’. I concur wholeheartedly.
MentalHelp.net has a review with a lot more detail about this book.
Kaila talks about the book in her video.
HighIncomeSource gives a good summary as well.
Where to connect with the author?
I don’t think one can connect with the author directly. I only found her bio on a few websites such as KI-Agency and Simon and Schuster. It makes sense, my dad shared her birth year and he passed this year.
Where can you buy the book?
Everywhere!
Takealot and Exclusive Books in South Africa.
Amazon elsewhere. Look on Apple Books and Google Books as well.
I also found it on PdFDrive. The audiobook is available on Audible and Audiobooks.com
Will I read it again?
Absolutely! I do want to invest in the audiobook though. And this is a book I am using now as workbook.
That’s it from me for now.
Until next time!
